QuotesGram. Officer: "I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses." Driver: "Officer, I have contacts." Officer: "I don't care who you know, you're still getting a ticket." New England Patriots/Giphy 31. Terri Guillemets, Tips for retirement from the science of happiness, In retirement, I look for days off from my days off. 20 Cops Memes Humor In 2020 Cops Humor Police Humor Cop Jokes . Upon retirement, you will take the long walk . 2. Ruby Dee, "Retirement means doing whatever I want to do. Some call it 'retirement.' Women go right on cooking." 59. Officer: Do you know how fast you were going?, Driver: Sorry, I was just trying to catch up with traffic. Officer: There is no traffic. I, for one, happen to fall in the first category. May the wife have a happy time. 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A life which is empty of purpose until 65 will not suddenly become filled on retirement. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples." Instead of manually entering the email addresses you want to send to each and every time, you can now create your own personalized contact list that will be available for you to use any time you want to share one of our posts with your friends and family. You've broken the law. We can no longer afford to scrap-pile people. It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating. Stephen Covey 47 Likes Police quotes Safety quotes Community quotes My friend was killed by a 2 ton sack of falling chickpeas. Finally a police car comes up. Unknown, Far from idleness being the root of all evil, it is rather the only true good. The doctor replies, "OK. Touch your elbow.". 56. 47. You've done your hard time and now it's time to enjoy some freedom! Retirement Farewell Quotes for Coworker. 7. your many years of sacrifice and service. The police retirement gifts listed above are awesome, for sure. Officer: No, I am an undercover detective. Tourist: So, why are you in uniform? Officer: Today is my day off.. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. #7 Dear husband, you have been successful all your life. 25. A police officer pulled me over and said, Papers.. Funny retirement sayings and quotes. We all hope you enjoy your retirement. Officer: I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses. Driver: Officer, I have contacts. Officer: I dont care who you know, youre still getting a ticket.. They say, Speed Limit 65.'. Sandra Day OConnor, Retirement is not in my vocabulary. I didn't grow up with professionals that retired. C K. Spartan Police Theme Party Cop Party Lego Party Policeman Party Officer Party Police Officer 6th Birthday Parties Boy Birthday Birthday Ideas Police Birthday Invitation Printable by TwirlyDesigns on Etsy, $12.00 S Kim Childers Police Wife Life Police Family After retirement, a 30 minute walk is the best thing to do for your ailments! It is the beginning of the open highway. Unknown, Dont act your age in retirement. Show me a sample retirement speech! Quotes tagged as "retirement" Showing 1-30 of 160. 2. Congratulations on making it out alive You take the cake! Some call it retirement. in all your future endeavors! Assisted Living Checklist: What To Ask & What To Look For, Quotes & Sayings For Retirement Cards 110 Quotes Continued, Retirement Party Ideas For Coworker | Canyon Winds, 30 Quotations About Getting Old - Desert Winds Retirement Community, Physical Games For Seniors - MeasurAbilities, LLC, 68 Retirement Wishes For A Boss - Canyon Winds Retirement, 65 Quotes About Getting Older | Funny & Inspirational Sayings, 55 Funny And Inspirational Quotes About Aging - Vista Winds Retirement, Motivational Fitness Quotes - Body Smith Fitness, 75 Funny Music Quotes - Amazing Mobile Music, 65 Getting Older Quotes | Chaparral Winds Retirement, Age is an issue of mind over matter. You're no longer cuffed to a job. Voltaire, The question isnt at what age I want to retire, its at what income. Unknown, "A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job." An officer comes across a man who is clearly under the influence. Let me tell all of you the truth, right here and now. It ain't going to happen.". I call it bliss. 124 Retirement Quotes: Funny Retirement Quotes, Inspirational Retirement Quotes and More! He says to the man, Were going to have to give you a drug test. Without hesitation, the man replies, Cool, which drugs are we testing?, 8. But I am happy you get to retire You always did inspire! 30. 19. Think about retirement as being two six month holidays per year. Jeanne Moreau, Its paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnt appeal to anyone. I didnt realize you were a cop.. Leave the Relaxing to Her! Why did the coffee call the police? Here are 25 retirement quotes for the next phase of your life: Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. Show your appreciation with unique quotes or personalized logos. Your email address will not be published. What's five times five?" "Twenty five," says Martin. Absolutely hillarious retirement one liners. 39. Happy retirement wishes! Anonymous We, the members of the NYPD, present this to you in recognition of Retirement is like coming home one day and telling your wife honey i m home for good. I call it bliss." There you will remain for the last of your days, alone and carrying the Law.". 11. Judge: I thought I said that I never wanted to see you in here again., Criminal: Thats what I kept telling the arresting officer, but he wouldnt listen.. tools, financial products, calculations, estimates, forecasts, comparison shopping products and services Unknown, "Retirement isn't the end of the road, but just a turn in the road." Retired. Unknown, People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Maya Angelou, I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. Retirement memes: Sometimes the good old joke gets, well, old. The retired guy goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I ache all over. Whos the most famous lawn detective? George Burns, You dont stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing. Scott Elledge, Retired is being twice tired, Ive thought first tired of working, then tired of not. The basic mission of Police is to PREVENT crime and disorder. "That's great!" says the doctor. Search, discover and share your favorite Retirement GIFs. These quotes are perfect to wish your retiring boss, teachers, doctors and co-workers. Sort: Relevant Newest # love # happy # work # job # greetings . 37. A bloody clock!" All sorted from the best by our visitors. 13 Funny Retirement Quotes to Write in Retirement Cards Lindsay Tigar Updated: Jan. 13, 2023 Retirement is a happy, celebratory time where one can finally reap the benefits of multi-decade. Retirement is just a never ending vacation. We know, for example, that after a lifetime of camaraderie that few experience, it will remain as a . Chaparral Winds is a retirement facility in Surprise, Arizona offering assisted living, independent living, and memory care services. Department, thank you for all you have Offer financial wellness to the people at the heart of your business. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.". Now, as the day dawns 49. I believe in financial retirement. Funny police retirement quotes sayings. Police Retirement. vision, and trust you instill in us! Jelly, powdered, glazed, and chocolate frosted. My wife gets mad at me because I always take things literally. A funny retirement poem is a great way to kick off the celebration. 43. Wishing you a happy retirement! ), or just manually add the email addresses you'd like to keep in your contact list. Doug Larson, When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. Nothing is impossible, the word itself says Im possible! A Retired Husband Becomes A Wife's Full-Time Job. 32. We've found several retirement quotes and sayings that will fit their personality. Ella Harris, "When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch." Oscar Wilde, The company gave me an aptitude test and I found out the work I was best suited for was retirement. A. We have a simple and elegant solution for you! Retirement is not impossible, get ahead with these tips to get ready! Jean Chatzky sums it up for me: "Whether it's fly-fishing, taking your camper to the Everglades, or just traveling, everyone has got a little retirement dream. Retirement is just a never ending vacation. Plan the celebration with a personalized retirement plaque. Officer: I notice your eyes are bloodshot. 6. POLICE OFFICER WIFE, Personalized, Prayer. I thought retiring was when you are tired and go to bed." If you dont mind, it doesnt matter. And who knows? Honor the dignity of the Thin Blue Line with police retirement plaque wording ideas that really mean something. Financial peace isnt the acquisition of stuff. HUMOROUS RETIREMENT QUOTES Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous When I was sixty-five - I still had pimples. After observing some erratic driving, he pulls the man over. Sylvester Stallone - Judge Dredd. As we express our gratitude, we must never Financial Planning You may also share these fun retirement quotes. Retirement is wonderful. Congratulations! "Won't You Celebrate with Me" by Lucille Clifton It's time to celebrate with loved ones. Why did the policeman stop you on your way home last Thanksgiving? Retirement: When you quit working just before your heart does. assets, income, and investments such as equity in a home or savings accounts in addition to your I was arrested by the grammar police for not using the full stop correctly. Do I lose when the police officer says papers and I say scissors? Police Retirement Quotes Funny. of loyal and dedicated service to If you give one of these to a colleague, friend, or family member that is looking forward to retirement, it will surely help you communicate your appreciation. May you enjoy your retirement! 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Discover and share Police Retirement Quotes Funny. to the New York Police Department. Betty White, "He who laughs last at the boss's jokes probably isn't far from retirement." Peter Lynch. Funny Cop Retirement Gift - Police Officer Retirement Poster By Adexyl $25.13 Copy of I Don't Always Enjoy Being a Retired Police Officer Poster By P4nd4store $24.69 I Don't Always Enjoy Being a Retired Police Officer Poster By P4nd4store $24.69 A Legendary Police Officer Has Retired Poster By HappyDelights $25.13 The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Jonathan Clements, I have never liked working. Lewis, Theres never enough time to do all the nothing you want. Bill Watterson, As in all successful ventures, the foundation of a good retirement is planning. Earl Nightingale, When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. R.C. To the People of Barnwell County, SC. Get great tips for managing money in retirement, What happens if you really do run out of money in retirement, 22 smart and easy ways to boost retirement savings, 4 ways to find meaning and purpose in retirement. What did the police officer say to the hand? Retirement's the most wonderful thing. "May all the years ahead bring you great joy and relaxation.". as you follow in His way, Why couldnt police notify the family of the murdered baker? 54. Richard Thaler, Not having to worry about money is almost like not having to worry about dying. Cars are backed up for miles. Pennsylvania State Police Department Seal We collect and curate only the best quotes, and display them in a clutter free, aesthetic list. 32. Our top 50 retirement quotes, wishes and sayings are useful for retirement cards. Before you criticize, wait. I hate a fellow whom pride or cowardice or laziness drive into a corner, and who does nothing when he is there but sit and growl. Read more quotes about aging, retirement and motivation: Sedona Winds Retirement Communityoffersindependent living in Sedona, Arizona, can help! Author Unknown, Learn how age discrimination can threaten your future, Retirement may be looked upon either as a prolonged holiday or as a rejection, a being thrown on to the scrap-heap. At PoemSearcher.com find thousands of poems categorized into thousands of categories. An officer sees a man exit a bar at closing time and get into his car. This is in line with the philosophy of the joy of being retired website which is to celebrate retirement and laugh at it instead of looking at it as a bad thing. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. significant financial decision. The claw Enforcement. 40. Funny Quotes About Retirement "Age is an issue of mind over matter. 62. To honor a retiring county sheriff, deputy, or other law enforcement officers or bid farewell as they embark on the next step of their professional career with this inspirational police quote and saying. Honestly, sleeping in past 5:30 a.m. sounds heavenly.